Laughing at My Future

This afternoon I laid my girls down for their naps and was straightening the house and felt the Lord download something into me with such force that in all truth I had to sit down and pray right then and there. And now I am here, to share it with you, in hopes that you will find it as encouraging as I did. Our oldest daughter, Olivia, just turned 5 this summer. She is bright, beautiful, sweet, and loves life in general, finding no greater joy than in the happiness of those around her, and in the Lord. Lately, she has hit some pretty big milestones, one of them being voluntary  assistance around the house. She likes to set the table, help put away the dishes, make the beds, fold the towels when they come out of the dryer, all these things and many more. Being 5, her joy and willingness to do this is still more on her terms and timing than ours, but we're learning to work with it, and 'take advantage' of and encourage her in it when presented. This being said, my home is

Right now it is just after one in the morning, making us officially an hour into Father's Day. And just a few hours ago, it had been officially been 6 weeks since my father, my daddy, left us and went to be with our Heavenly Father. 6 of the shortest, as well as longest, weeks of my life. To be honest, it's a lot to deal with sometimes, even now. And yet, as I sit here in this moment, I'm not overcome with tears and grief, but rather with peace; even more so, with a certain thankfulness in my heart that cannot be explained, and definitely cannot be removed. I've been wondering for the last couple of weeks about this first Father's Day without my daddy - how it would feel, how I would do. And of course it will be different a bit I'm sure, as I go to bed, wake up, and actually start the day. But for now, I'm good, and I'm glad. I had a minor breakdown in Target the other day, while looking through the Father's Day cards. My sister and I were pickin

As the clock stuck twelve tonight and the date became the 4th of June, so came with it the one month mark since my father, my hero, my daddy, finished his battle with cancer and went to be with The Lord. I still, most of the time, cannot believe it's really true. Some days I feel like I'm really moving on, moving forward, healing somewhat. Other days I'm a wreck. Every last thing reminds me of him and I can hardly function because of how much I miss him. I'm so grateful for the undercurrent of peace that is constantly flowing in my life - the one that rushes in behind the waves of grief and helps to calm and soothe my aching heart. I know that God has a plan, and my faith in Him is unwavering, but I am still hurting, plain and simple. And so, one month later, I offer you a piece of my heart. I hope that soon, the ravings and musings you read on this blog will be filled with hilarity that I really do get to experience every day with my amazing family, but for now I must

My children didn't nap today. Not in the "we just got too busy so it didn't happen" sort of way, but in the bold-faced, toddler-defiant sort of way. And it happens sometimes, to anyone who has a toddler, but today it hurt. A lot. Because a year ago, I was having the same sort of day, my older two (then a year younger) were giving me a good, hard time during the day and then refusing to nap and going CRAZY and I was at my wits end, texting my mom and not sure what to do because as a pregnant, newly "at-home" mom, this was foreign to me. And my daddy called me, to "talk me down from the ledge" and reassure me that even the best parents have hard days. I cried and cried but he was so soothing and loving that I knew it was going to be okay, and even if my schedule didn't run perfectly for that one day it didn't mean I was going on the list of bad moms. Last Saturday, my daddy passed away, ending a 14-month very long, very hard, very valiant

Boy, when God decides to download, He really downloads! Yesterday morning during my reading and devotion time He was revealing to me regarding level of faith, and the action on His part that comes accordingly. Last night, He struck an entirely different and yet completely related chord concerning faith, and what the surrender involved really involves. {does that make any sense? I hope so!} The Bible is filled with stories and testimony in regards to this subject. I'd like to focus on just a few. Because what I feel like God showed me, and very "loudly" reminded me of is this: Truly walking in faith means surrendering not only the circumstance you're in...but the outcome as well. It's not just trusting God right now, it's trusting God then, too. Abraham comes to mind when being challenged in the area of faith, and total surrender. In Genesis we are given the account of when God instructed him to prove his faithfulness to Him and take his only son, hi

Something I've discovered I love about reading through the entire Bible every year is the fresh revelation brought out in passages I must have seen a hundred times before. This morning it was a simple sentence, read in Matthew 9:29 "Then He touched their eyes and said, "Because of your faith, it will happen."" (NLT) Did the light of heaven shine down with a heavenly chorus just then? For me, it did. I honestly don't even want to guess how many times I've read "your faith has made you well" in my life, because I know it's a lot, but also because it's kind of embarrassing to admit that my life does not reflect the knowledge and fruit that it should if this is truly written on my heart. How many times do you feel God has promised something - whether it be a miracle of healing or provision, or a calling you feel He's placed on your life that you're waiting for the door to open to - and yet it's just not happening? You feel a

Luke 22:32  "But I have pleaded in prayer for you, Simon, that your faith should not fail. So when you have repented and turned to me again, strengthen your brothers." Jesus KNEW Peter was going to mess up. He doesn't say here that His prayer was that Peter wouldn't have an imperfect moment or action, but that his faith wouldn't fail when he did. That way, not only would he return to Him, but be better equipped to aid the other followers of Christ in their walks. This got me to thinking - as Christians, we fail. Sometimes a little, sometimes MISERABLY, but we fail just the same. So what is our reaction when this occurs? Do we run back to the way we were before Christ, counting it all as a waste? Do we repent and try not to mess up again, all the while secretly sulking in embarrassment that we are human and erred? Or do we embrace the mistake along with the grace and forgiveness He gives, make the determination to change, and take what we learned to those